Thankful

Oh, about the fourth load of laundry for the day, and the third load in the dishwasher, about the two a.m. Demon Baby wake-up call, I start to feel less than thankful. Things have been so stressful around here, I haven't been able to even get a haircut in three or four months . . . I always seem to have more bills than checks each month. My bathroom shower is leaking into the ceiling of my kitchen . . . and Demon Baby's NEW trick is opening the intake area of the heating system and pulling out the air filter and then trying to hide in there. My Dad is here, and he's blind . . . and that makes me incredibly sad.

But actually . . . I am thankful my parents are visiting for a month and they are both HERE, still with me physically. As for the rest of my exhausting life, I am thankful. I wish I could say I was evolved enough as a person to be thankful with each and every sleepless step and moment. Each and every time I have to race out at night because someone forgot to tell me they need posterboard for a school project. Each and every time the mail comes and it's . . . bills. I'm not, though. As a writer, I have to find ways to juggle it all from home, mostly by myself, with four kids. I gave up coffee a year ago, but I've been hitting the caffeine this month just to get it all done.

But thankful I am. I have four wonderful children who make each day an adventure. I can't even describe what being a mother means to me. My children make me laugh, smile, and sometimes cry; they each have qualities I admire and talents that are unique. We are all healthy. I've been winning my battle with Crohn's disease many more days than not, thanks to Traditional Chinese Medicine, a long remission, and sheer will. I have a beautiful home that's usually filled with a lot of noise and children and pets. I have a completely fat incorrigible corgi who thinks he's a lap dog and two pups, one of whom can make a flying leap and land on the table--talented! But they give unconditional love. I have a best friend--not just ANY best friend, but the most talented, giving, funny person . . . and (bonus!) she bakes the best cookies in North America and possibly the globe. I have a guy who still thinks I'm the hottest babe in the room--and will tell me that after the third consecutive sleepless night, with no shower, no makeup, and wearing a T-shirt from a concert I attended 10 years ago. Obviously, he's been smoking crack, but you get the idea.

I have a job I love. No matter how tired I am, sitting in my home office working my own hours, writing for a living is better than any career I could have dreamed up for myself. I get to make stuff up for a living. I get to tell stories.

And last but not least . . . I have a community of writer pals who mean a lot to me--both in person and online. Thank you to all the regulars on this blog for making my lonely writer's existence a little less lonely and more like an online office. Thank you to the lurkers out there--you know who you are. Thank you to my readers . . . I appreciate all the emails I get . . . thank you, thank you, thank you.

Happy Holiday!

Peace,
E