Everything I Needed to Know About Being a Writer . . . I Learned From Demon Baby
Demon Baby breakdances now. For real. He's actually wildly talented at it. Which is amusing since no one in the family breakdances. He's like some hip-hop god in a 32-pounds-when-soaking-wet package. As I watched him do this for a HALF-HOUR last night (without stopping to rest once), I contemplated the lessons he has taught me about being a writer:
- Be fearless. Demon Baby doesn't know fear. Whether he is trying to climb out the window, or fearlessly throwing syrup from the second-story landing, whether he charging full-speed at a wall just because, or breakdancing when no one's taught him . . . he is fearless. So I remember when I come to a point in my work in progress when I just don't know if I am writer enough to pull it off and I am afraid . . . BE FEARLESS.
- Ignore your critics. For Demon Baby, most of what I say comes out like the parents in the Peanuts episodes. "MWAH, MWAH-MWAH-MWAH-MWAH" and he goes about doing what he's doing anyway. Sometimes we need to ignore our critics--especially that inner one.
- When life hands you rejection, ask for a peanut butter sandwich. We all have bad days. When Demon Baby has a bad day, he wants half a peanut-butter sandwich (CREAMY, not crunchy). As an addendum to that, he wants the crusts cut off. When we face rejection, we should be kind to ourselves. And if there is someone special in our life, we should ask them to cut the crusts off so we feel extra loved.
- Don't give up. This is a big one. Demon Baby has been trying to accomplish numerous missions. He wants the dogs to have total free rein in the house and be allowed to eat--like yesterday--the good cookies I bought for company. He has been trying to defeat the squirrels that raid his bird feeder by swinging his plastic light-up Star Wars Jedi light saber. But the squirrels return each day. He has been trying to bark and have conversations WITH the dogs. In their language. Despite the fact that he has not accomplished each of these things (with the exception of the last one--I think they are starting to listen to him and talk back), the next day he gets up COMPLETELY OBLIVIOUS to the failure of the day before, and he tries again.
- Dream big dreams. Most kids want to be an astronaut. Demon Baby wants to grow up to BE the moon. Not GO to the moon, but BE the moon. Enough said.
- Fight the dragons of doubt. Demon Baby is under the impression that dragons live under the stairs. The entrance to their lair is through the air conditioning intake. He tries, almost daily, to take that apart so he can go and fight the dragons. I think of the dragons under the stairs as the dragons of doubt. It's good to leave them locked under the stairs, and if they come back, use your light saber to chase them back where they belong.
- Free your imagination. If you read over on my Demon Baby blog . . . Demon decided he has a new name--Kirby. He also has a Hong Kong name--Tun-Link. He only answers to those names. Just in case you wondered . . . they are NOT his real name. Demon Baby has a rich inner life full of imagination. He sees things mere mortals do not. It is unfettered imagination, not tied in any way to the reality of the rest of the world. Writers need that kind of imagination.
- Crayons are fun. We have crayons and marker pretty much everywhere. On furniture. On walls. On the carpet. I look at this as . . . not being afraid of the red pen. Edit away!
So there you go. Turns out I know everything there is to know about being a writer--from Demon Baby.
Any lessons you learned about being a writer from your kids or dogs or cats . . . that you care to share?
Labels: Demon Baby
posted by Erica Orloff at 6:34 AM
27 Comments:
I think #3 is a classic!
From my dog, Frodo, I would throw in: develop a habit (MUST. HAVE. THREE. WALKS. A. DAY.) for writing, so actually sitting down at the desk/computer at a particular time and actually working becomes automatic, regardless of what else is going on your life.
Oh, and: sometimes you just gotta play in the sprinkler.
Mark
WISE Frodo. :-) Demon Baby is so wild that we don't have a routine. But maybe we should.
The trouble with learning about writing from cats, dogs, and demon babies is that wine just doesn't ever seem to make the list.
stephen:
Speak for your dogs. Mine like a nice pinot.
E
I stand corrected.
Lol! I lost my breakfast at #2. That's exactly how I feel when I'm talking to my kids.
Great advice, E! :-)
Stephen:
The snake likes a nice chardonnay.
E
Heather:
Mwah?
E
All great points!
Lemme see, my kids taught me I am capable of great things because I had them, and they're pretty great. They also taught me patience. A little anyway. =)
I'd prefer not to learn anything from the school of dogs. Yella Fella thinks if it fits in his mouth it is edible. L'il Brown Girl thinks the porcelain throne is her personal wine glass.
Lainey:
My dogs respect the status of the toilet. But they WILL eat CDs/DVDs that Demon Baby "feeds" them. They have quite a symbiotic relationship going on there.
E
Erica, DB is so wise. I'd like to have one of him around - for about an hour.
I learned from my cat that if you stick around the treat cabinet long enough, meow constantly and ignore the word "no," someone will eventually give you treats. In other words, don't give up!
Edie:
Yeah. Most people I know want to "borrow" him--but not for long. ;-)
E
I love it! My cats have taught me to have fun, focus, and relax. I mean, really relax. They're amazing when they relax. Every single muscle is just loose and sprawled and not a thing in the world will get them to move.
Except the can opener, of course.
PS: I still color with crayons. *blush* Not on walls and carpets, though!
spy:
I wish I could relax like that.
E
This is a keeper!
Do paints count? I painted a quilt on my wall once. It's still there.
Love the additions in the comments, too. Relaxing is a hard one.
My babies sleep - a lot. And they're into whatever is right in front of them, not thinking about what happened yesterday or what might come tomorrow.
Sarah:
Animals know how to live in the moment. They have a compassionate wisdom sometimes. I remember our old dog, Honi, never left Oldest's side one time--I had been admitted to the hospital for three weeks with Crohn's disease, and Oldest was 4 and was very sick with the flu or something. And Honi let Oldest use her as a pillow and NEVER got up. Never left her. Loyalty, wisdom. I am sure Honi is in heaven--she dies five years ago and I STILL get weepy and ache missing her.
E
From my children I learned that being daddy is being a superhero - and that I will always be that even if I never get published or write anything good.
From my cats I learned that nothing is more important than relaxing - sometimes not even food.
From the dog comes this - sometimes the most satisfying thing is to take a good long pee and then forget about whatever was going on and find a new toy to play with.
From my wife I learned that love conquers all... no, really it does.
from Erica's blog and all of the wonderfull commenters here I learned that everyone has some amazing and creative story to tell that is their story and no one else can tell it.
Eowh:
Utterly lovely. Except for the peeing part. . . . Oh, even that, too, I suppose. ;-)
E
Awww... thanks Erica.
I could have gone a few different ways with the dog comment... but being true to my dog, that is what is so with him :) Offer him food or a chance to go do his business on some unsuspecting flora, he'll go with the doing his business almost every time, even if has just been outside.
Oh, I just love this post! Demon Baby sounds like my kind of guy!
I've learned from my son that it's quite all right, healthy even, to enjoy something for its own sake; and, that there are very few problems in life that cannot be fixed with ice cream.
I guess what I learned mostly is unconditional love. I think it would be impossible to write convincingly without first knowing that.
Hah -- Demon Baby rocks!! :)
The most important thing I've learned from my demon babies is to Do It. Don't wait until the perfect time, or until you have achieved spiritual perfection. Right now, tired, covered in spit up, you have the seeds of glory within you!! Really!
Kids don't slow down long enough to regret their choices -- they just go right ahead and choose some more. And they don't worry about perfection. As a recovering perfectionist, that's a lesson I need to relearn every day.
Great post, Erica!
MicheleL
Alyson:
I'm glad he's someone's kind of guy. ;-)
E
Jude:
Lovely lessons.
E
Michele:
Yes! Wonderful lessons from your kids. Thanks for sharing!!!
E
I have so enjoyed this post and all the comments. Thank you everyone for making my day - perhaps my week.
Hi Suzanne:
Thanks so much! That means a lot.
:-)
E
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