Conflict--Internal versus External
I have a book coming out with Penguin in 2010. I haven't announced it on Publisher's Lunch yet . . . not sure why, just haven't, though my agent sold the manuscript a year ago. I now have rewrite notes, and the main issue I must focus on in sexual tension.
I can tell you that though I love Moonlighting (Bruce Willis and Cybil Shepherd), I pretty much loathed Cheers. My main reason was, frankly, I cannot stand the chronic "will they or won't they" routine. I was never a fan of Sex and the City--is she with Mr. Big or not with Mr. Big? I don't like romantic comedies most of the time for the same reason. Just sleep together and get it over with. It's not that I don't like sexual tension. It's the BICKERING that most of these movies and books seem to put characters through on the WAY to the bedroom--often after months or years.
In my books, I usually establish that the characters love each other pretty close to the outset--and EXTERNAL conflict drives them apart. But in reality, most of the time my editors urge me to add some INTERNAL conflict. Some tension between them. Doubts. Lingering issues.
I have the hardest time with this. I have few doubts in my own life. I'm an "it is what it is" person. I don't long for what I can't have. I don't wish for another life, or wish for some happy ending, unless, of course, we're talking him. You would THINK this request from my editor would be easy.
For me . . . it's not.
Every writer has something they struggle with. This is mine. I have to dig deeper and find conflict--conflict I don't FEEL. So if I suddenly argue with everyone in my life today, that's why. I'm searching for my inner conflict.
Thoughts?
I can tell you that though I love Moonlighting (Bruce Willis and Cybil Shepherd), I pretty much loathed Cheers. My main reason was, frankly, I cannot stand the chronic "will they or won't they" routine. I was never a fan of Sex and the City--is she with Mr. Big or not with Mr. Big? I don't like romantic comedies most of the time for the same reason. Just sleep together and get it over with. It's not that I don't like sexual tension. It's the BICKERING that most of these movies and books seem to put characters through on the WAY to the bedroom--often after months or years.
In my books, I usually establish that the characters love each other pretty close to the outset--and EXTERNAL conflict drives them apart. But in reality, most of the time my editors urge me to add some INTERNAL conflict. Some tension between them. Doubts. Lingering issues.
I have the hardest time with this. I have few doubts in my own life. I'm an "it is what it is" person. I don't long for what I can't have. I don't wish for another life, or wish for some happy ending, unless, of course, we're talking him. You would THINK this request from my editor would be easy.
For me . . . it's not.
Every writer has something they struggle with. This is mine. I have to dig deeper and find conflict--conflict I don't FEEL. So if I suddenly argue with everyone in my life today, that's why. I'm searching for my inner conflict.
Thoughts?
Labels: conflict
posted by Erica Orloff at 7:38 AM
34 Comments:
I think fear has to be at the heart of it.
Jude:
Hmm . . . thanks. Food for thought.
FEAR.
What does my character fear?
E
You might want to think in terms of one character longing for what the other fears, and vice versa.
Argue with everyone today? What about that scrabble game with blasted now I can't think of his name.
Inner Conflict: How about someone who hasn't reached that point of it is what it is. Who is the hero she aspires to and falls short of? Because when she sees herself as human she begins to see others that way too.
Richmond:
Stephen is a Scrabble coward! How's THAt for conflict--LOL!
In my book, there is a hunt for the origins of an ancient palimpsest. And the two hunters are the son of an agoraphobic illuminated manuscript expert and the niece of the illuminated manuscripts expert for a major auction house. They are attracted to each other--but he's very neurotic, and she is very level-headed. Maybe that's my problem--she's so wise and level-headed that she thinks enough for everyon. I have to find her some inner turmoil.
E
Oh, yummy! See, that is my favorite, favoritest, favorite-favoritest part. I don't know what genre this is, but sometimes just withholding a consummation and any confirmation of the relationship can help. You know, let those feelings just bristle under the surface.
I was once housemates with a man. We had our own relationships, and for a year we never even touched each other. Not a pat on the back, nothing. It got to the point where the air between us was just electric, and yet we never crossed that barrier (well, not until later), if only because of habit.
I swear, if he'd have just touched a finger to my skin, I'd've probably orgasmed on the spot.
Janet Evanovich is pretty brilliant at sexual tension. The less you give and the more you withhold, the more powerful the sexual tension becomes. If you want it to build, withhold something, even if they do get together in some way.
I tend to imagine seducing the reader. *blush*
Hi Spy:
I can admire when others do it well . . . it's just been a tough one for me.
E
I confess I like romantic comedies, but I also recognize that, in most cases, the sexual tension is pretty artificial. In my experience, in real life, when people want to have sex, they tend to.
One of the TV shows (one of the few I watch) that I think handles the sexual tension very well is "Bones." Simply put, there's a lot of sexual tension between Booth and Bones, but they're partners and neither of them is willing to risk their partner relationship by having sex--even though it's clear they both want to very much.
So I can see a way of creating a logical reason not to have sex that's innate to the characters--one's religious beliefs, workplace rules, cultural reasons, fear of disease, fear of pregnancy, fear of ruining a relationship they like as it is and are afraid that if they have sex it'll wreck the relationship.
What if she has it all together, but something makes it flip. I think people base their lives on certain truths, and what if the thing she counts on, the one thing that gives her utter security and confidence (maybe something she never even realized she counted on), is simply not true or fails in some way? What would happen to her confidence then?
I loved Moonlighting too -- until they got together and then split up and saw other people. That was a little weird.
My characters are usually emotionally damaged and unable to trust another person deeply enough to commit to each other. Or they are consumed by their external goals. They eventually have sex, but that doesn't mean they're ready for commitment.
Could your heroine be so wise and level-headed she thinks it's illogical that a relationship between them would never work? Yet she knows that sex with him would be so fabulous no other man would measure up? (I didn't mean "measure up" as a pun, but I'm laughing now.)
hehehe I LOVE the bickering. Except I call it banter. Because sometimes banter isn't just flirting, sometimes it's: "I hate you, but I want to sleep with you, and as soon as the want to sleep with you part overcomes the hate you part, watch out, Buddy!"
I agree with what Spy is saying also, otherwise it's emotionally too "happyverse."
Nice in life, but not so much in fiction.
Edie, that pun was SO intentional, lol. :)
Erica, I'm still trying to wrap my brain around that entire GMC thing. Every time I hear it, I can only think of that vitamin store at the mall. So, any kind of conflict, whether external or internal, is SO lost on me.
I say that if two people feel the sexual tension and haven't gotten it out of the way immediately, then they should just forget about it. Over thinking getting laid just takes all the spontaneity and fun out of it.
My two stories (god I'm pathetic) have had couples that are kept apart by circumstances. Now, neither is a romance, it's just a subplot - I don't know if I'd enjoy writing the bickering/bantering. A little too close to home. ;)
Mark:
I have seen that show. I never thought that guy (previously on Buffy) was very sexy. But then I watched a couple of episodes of Bones and totally changed my mind. It was the characters and their relationship. Yes. Excellent example. I will think on that.
E
sex scenes . . .
Hmm . . . like that. I think I have to make her more of a scholar in some ways. Also, someone she comes to care about in the book is destroyed--or nearly destroyed--by powerful lawyers. It does make her question the inherent fairness (or lack thereof) of the world.
E
Hmm . . . Edie. I like that.
E
zoe:
I had an entire BOOk of banter in Spanish Disco. They refused to meet each other--he lived in England, she lived in the U.S. I adored their banter. But at its HEART, you always knew they were each other's true north. You just didn't know if she would compromise and soften enough to give it a chance.
E
kath:
LOL! Agreed.
:-)
E
melanie:
Mine don't bicker. Ever. Maybe they should have more banter (to use Zoe's term).
ARGH! I hate this!!!! I hate when my brain hurts from thinking about a book.
E
FF here. For what it's worth, I hate when characters have internal conflict. It so wacky that I want to say "get over yourself". But maybe it is internal conflict done less than well that I hate. Good luck with trying to manufacture some internal conflict.
I loved Cheers, though not for Sam and Diane so much as for the ensemble cast - which is of course, completely beside the point here.
Generally what I notice in relationships that are slow to build is not so much circumstance or external but self-inflicted doubt. I think of this like high school - you like like someone, but do they really like like you or do they just like you? What if you kiss them and they're not into it and they totally don't react and then you'd just be devestated? But that can't happen because you're soul mates, except what if the whole love connection thing is totally in your head and they don't feel the same way and then you're just sad and pathetic?
I think it comes back to fear and the fact that in real life people seldom lay all of their emotions on the table, because it's an easy way to get hurt, so in the beginning of a relationship it's a lot of guessing and hoping that what you feel is returned and not just your own delusion.
The less you give and the more you withhold, the more powerful the sexual tension becomes.
Suddenly I understand why I was so horny as a teenager. Found another outlet, though; got really good at Scrabble.
I was told that my book was full of internal conflict but that the external conflict was weak -- maybe that's because it is that way with my life mostly. But to see if from character's point of view, and to relate to more readers, the push-me-pull-you between the characters resonates, I think. It makes it more visual and palpable than only having internal conflict. I didn't like it at first, driven mostly by my internal motivation. But as I learned about it and wrote it, I saw how it moved the story along and did not mess with the internal conflict, it sometimes enhanced it. I'm sure that you will tackle this one just fine, E, but I'm alway glad to know of the struggles of successful authors. Makes me feel not so alone out here off the shelf!
Hey FF:
Well . . . I guess in this case, I mean sexual tension between the characters more so than "they are in love and OUTSIDE forces keep them apart."
And you're right, done well you don't notice so much.
E
Hi Merry:
I loved Carla and the extended gang and dreaded Sam and Diane.
And that said . . . have you ever seen Adaptation? There is a scene in which one brother tells the other about what everyone thought was "unrequited" love. It's a BRILLIANT scene . . . and it's also kind of a spoiler so . . .
But what he said summarizes love for me. You can love someone fearlessly without being worried about being loved in return. THAT'S what love is. I guess maybe I don't feel that fear . . . or don't remember feeling it.
E
Stephen:
But even at Scrabble you are a tease.
E
Amy:
Glad my pain amuses you. LOL!
And I definitely agree . . . one enhances the other!!
E
I'm going to have to add Spanish Disco to my list!
I've always loved writing character-driven novels. I guess that's more an internal thing, haven't a clue really. I never stop to analyze, cause it'd probably screw me up. lol.
Congrats on the Penquin coming up too! You go!
I too have problems with that internal conflict keeping them apart thing. It often seems artificial and annoying.
Any conflict my characters have is from their pasts but usually they are too busy fighting the big bad boogie man to let things fester too much.
I must admit I have never had that kind of conflict between me and a man. If I wanted (happily married now)him, I moved in and I didn't give too much thought to more lofty ideals. Therefore I have difficulty understanding that kind of conflict.
ladonna:
Thanks!
E
Suzanne:
Yeah. That's what I struggle with. And then I have a "missed connection" thing--which feels forced and artificial. So I need to fix that, too.
E
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