The Towel

A regular reader of this blog asked me if all writers wonder if they should quit. Just give it up, hang up their hat, or in the boxing adage, throw in their towel.

A few thoughts . . .

I used to think that being published represented the Holy Grail of writing. Now I realize that if you are driven as a writer, there is always "the next book." I used to think that if I ever got in a national magazine, like Cosmopolitan, a mention in a publication like US Weekly, that I would faint. That that was my new Holy Grail. But then that happened . . . and somehow, there was another goal. No matter where you are on the food chain, there is always something you want as a writer. Some angst. So just because someone is published, or unpublished . . . doesn't matter . . . in a sense, probably every writer wonders at some point or another, if this insane passion is worth the rejection, the waking up at dawn to write, the loneliness, whatever. About two months ago, when I was just down and tired and worried about people in my life, and driving 8 hours for a funeral and all the rest of it, I thought I would just chuck my career and go back to bartending. I just wanted to sling drinks and take a break. But I didn't.

Why?

As I tell kids in elementary school when I go to talk to classes about writing, being a writer isn't something you "become." It's something you ARE. There's no test to certify you as a writer. And those things like being published . . . even they aren't enough to "prove" you have talent. There are awards, like the Pulitzer . . . but there aren't enough of those to go around.

But being a writer is something you are. If tomorrow I said, "I am never going to write another word," I am convinced I would be certifiable in a week or two. It's not that I can't take a break from writing . . . I can. But what would I do with all this stuff in my head? All the characters? The snippets of dialogue? The great opening lines.

My first instinct was to look at the corpse.

I love that first line to The Roofer. What would I have done with that line if I didn't have a book to put it in?

I think the cure for wondering if you should throw in the towel is to delve yourself in craft, in the pure joy of making stuff up, in your world.

I don't know . . . that's my take. Anyone else?